The More the Craziness, the Less the Sanity
by ayshariham
Summary: The gang goes on the sets of a popular TV Show. And they make a complete fool of themselves xD CRACK ALERT!


A random _**idea**_ running in my head, begging to be written down. I had to stop studying Anatomy, because the _**idea**_ wouldn't let me study.

This better be worth it =D

I'm going to put my Muse in detention otherwise. xD

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"_Waaah!!! You're going to be on TV!" squealed Sakura, jumping around._

"_And in the most popular talk show, no less" said Ino, joining in, bumping into Sakura and toppling over with her._

"_Will you guys quit acting like jerks? You're embarrassing us" said Sasuke, frowning._

_Sakura and Ino immediately regained their composure and settled into their designated seats in the audience. Hinata and Tenten were already there, along with Choji. Kiba had refused to come because the guard had forbidden Akamaru from entering the hall, on account of him chewing off the cover of a couple of seats. _

_Sasuke, Naruto, Shikamaru, Neji and Temari walked over to the set and settled into the couches there._

"_Alright!" cried the director "We're ready to roll! We'll be on air in 5 … 4... 3... 2... 1!"_

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"Welcome to a new episode of "Populars!" Today, we are going to get up close and personal with none other than The Ninjas of Konoha!...and one from the Sand " announced their host, a blond guy with dazzling white teeth. "Yes, it's an odd set that we have here" he said gesturing towards the ninjas," but that's what makes it fun!"

"We're glad to have you here with us. Our first question is for the most popular ninja, the cool-as-ice Sasuke-kun!" he continued, beaming at them.

"No fair!" muttered Naruto "I'm going to become the Hokage, why don't I get first?"

The host rambled on, ignoring Naruto.

"Sasuke-kun, your fans want to know how you'll confess to a girl" he asked.

Sasuke's head jerked up, being thrown off by this question.

"That…That's a private…thing…" he mumbled. "But I can assure you one thing, my love for a girl will never precede the hatred I have for Itachi" he said, his eyes ablaze, "When I find him, the torture he'll go through-"

"Yes, Yes, we know" cut in the host hastily, looking around helplessly.

Temari spoke up. " Sasuke-kun, when you say your love for a girl will never be more than your hatred, does the same apply if you're in love with a boy?" she asked grinning.

Grins lit up the faces of all the ninjas except Sasuke. The host looked delighted at the intervention.

"Temari…What exactly are you-?" Sasuke began

"You know _what_… Wasn't Naru~uto your first kiss?" she asked, winking.

The murderous glint in Sasuke's eyes contrasted comically with the blush that had reddened his face. Giggles broke out in the room.

"Naruto!" said Temari, rounding on him, "You realise a first kiss is very important right?"

Naruto nodded, completely serious.

"Your first kiss connects your soul to your partner's, doesn't it?" she continued, struggling to keep a straight face.

Naruto looked confused, but nodded. _Temari seemed to know what she was saying, he thought. Best to just go along with her. He didn't want to be made a fool of. It didn't explain why Sasuke's face was darkening though._

"Isn't that how love begins, Naruto? A union of souls?" she continued, softening her voice.

Naruto considered it. "Yeah" he said, " You're right, Temari-san. It all starts with a kiss…"

Naruto's eyes widened with horror when he realized what he had just said.

Laughter exploded in the room, Kiba, Tenten and Temari were rolling on the floor at the horrified expression on Sasuke's face. Even Neji had a tiny smile; it was obvious he was trying hard to restrain his laughter.

Sasuke's clenched fists were itching to punch Temari's smirk off her face. Maybe he could just punch stupid Naruto. He was closer, anyways. Luckily, the host realized a fight would be up next if the topic didn't change - having his set blasted was not what he had agreed upon.

He clapped his hands loudly, and a heavy silence enveloped the room broken by a slight rumbling and Choji munching on his never-ending bag of chips.

"Our next question will be for…" he said, glancing around, still ignoring Naruto's hopeful eyes and settling on Neji.

"Neji-kun, what are the qualities you'll look for in your soul mate?" he asked

Neji's stoic face revealed nothing as he replied in his monotone, "Smart and reliable. I know she's out there in my destiny, I have yet to find her."

Temari was the only one who saw Tenten's expression falter a little.

"Smart, huh?" the host said "Would you agree with that view, Shikamaru-kun-"

He paused when he realized the rumbling sound was Shikamaru snoring.

"Erm…Shikamaru-kun?" said Naruto, poking him in the ribs.

_No response._

"Wake up!" he yelled into his ear

_Grunt. Snore_.

"The host wants to know about your love life" Naruto said, poking Shikamaru in the eyes.

"**Gaaah!"** yelled Shikamaru, "_Don't operate on my eye too, Temari!!! Paint that fish first…_" he broke off when he finally snapped out of his dream.

When no one spoke for a whole minute, he tired of the stares he was receiving. "Geez", he muttered, and went back to sleep.

"Hah!" cried out Sasuke "He was dreaming of YOU, Temari-san. What d'you have to say of that?"

"Nothing. He's allowed to dream whatever he wants, you know. His head, his thoughts" she replied, shrugging.

"Shikamaru-kun SO has a thing for you, Temari-san" said Naruto, joyously.

"Temari-san, what do you look for in a guy?" asked the host, smiling.

"…or girl…" muttered Sasuke.

Temari grinned. "Someone completely energetic, full of the vigor of life, who will cherish me. Being a lil dumb is kinda cute too. Definitely a "**he**" though, that's my dream guy." she ended, her eyes set challengingly at Sasuke's.

The host grew more nervous. Were those sparks flying between Temari's and Sasuke's glares? Would they set this place on fire?

"Erm, Temari-san, you realise these qualities are the exact opposite of Shikamaru-kun?" he asked, dropping his voice to a theatrical whisper. "Would you reject him if he ever asked you out?"

Temari smiled mischievously. "_Dream guys are only for dreams. They're not my reality_."

Whistles and claps broke out in the audience.

"Sadly, our time has drawn to an end. Thank you for being with us today. Is there anything you'd like to say before you leave, Ninjas?" the host concluded.

Temari stood up. "I'd like to say something to Neji-kun." she said, turning towards him. "Maybe the girl you're waiting for is already here, Neji-kun. Maybe even right here in this room. Just give her a chance."

Neji's blank face remained blank. The slight widening of his eyes as it hit him was not missed by Temari though.

Sasuke marched up and grabbed the mike. "It's my unfortunate task to announce that Temari cracked her head when she slipped off the cliff during practice. Please ignore whatever comments-"

Temari snatched the mike out of Sasuke's hands and banged his head with it.

"Let's take this outside, kid" she said, dragging him towards the exit.

Naruto grinned and took over the mike. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. _Finally, his chance of glory. This would be a speech to go down in history._

"I want to let you all know that I'm going to become the Hokage. The best damned one **EVER**. I'm going to make this whole village happy. I'm going to make it successful. And then **I'm going to marry the girl I'm in love with**. **Sakura-chan, just wait for me!**" he cried, opening his eyes.

The studio was empty.

Except for the host and the prop guys, the others had left.

"Sorry" said the host, "We already went off air."

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Let me know what you thought of it =)


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